More Green Joke!?

A little girl and the Bird

A little girl was walking along a beach in California when she came across a man with no clothes on and just a newspaper covering his genitals.
The little girl said, "What do you have under that newspaper, Mister?"
The man said, "Nothing, it's just a bird, now go away!"
The man thought nothing of her and quickly fell asleep.
Hours later, the man woke up in a hospital bed in excruciating pain.
"Where the hell am I?"
A doctor replied, "Someone called 9-1-1 and said you needed emergency help,
so we rushed you right over."
"Well, what the hell happened to me?"
"We don't know, son. Do you remember anything unusual happening to you today?"
The man said, "Well, there was a little girl bugging me just before I fell asleep."
The doctor sent someone to the beach to see if the little girl was still there, and she was.
The person said, "Do you know what happened to that nice man you saw here earlier?"
"Well," the little girl said, "I started to play with that nice little bird that he had and the damn thing spit on me. So, I wrung its neck, broke its eggs, and set its nest on fire!" :P



Communication Problem?

There was this Asian lady married to an American gentleman and they lived in Honolulu.
The poor lady was not very proficient in English,
but managed to communicate with her husband.
The real problem arose whenever she had to shop for groceries.

One day, she went to the butcher and wanted to buy pork legs.
She didn't know how to put forward her request, and in desperation,
lifted up her skirt to show her thighs.
The butcher got the message and the lady went home with pork legs.

The next day, she needed to get chicken breasts.
Again, she didn't know how to say,
and so she unbuttoned her blouse to show the butcher her breast.
The lady got what she wanted.

The 3rd day, the poor lady needed to buy sausages. Unable to find a way
to communicate this, she brought her husband to the store......








What were you thinking? Helloooooooooo, her husband speaks English!!

Gilugos sa Igsoon

Sakit hunahunaon nga sa panahon nato karon, dunay mga lain nga panghitabo sama sa pagpanglugos sa kaugalingon nga igsoon...imbes sila ang mo protekta sila pa hinuon ang mamahimong hinungdan sa pagkaguba sa kaugmaon niini. Kung buot natong pamalandungan ngilngig jud...ngano in-ani naman ang mga tao karon?

Sakit nga kamatuoran, apan dili ika limod nga nahitabo,

gi rape sa kaugalingong igsoon.

Scroll down para masaksihan ninyo mismo ang kamatuoran,

*Not Suitable for very young audiences, parental guidance is recommended*

*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*

Green Joke

Para maiba napud ang mga jokes noh...para mas exciting mao nang green jokes napud ta karon...prepare yourself for awesomeness!

<==== Nyahaha.... nagpabuyag ang tigulang oh! Apil apil og katawa! saba ja! hihihi

The FINALISTS:

Miss America
Miss Spain
Miss Britain
Miss Philippines
Miss Iran
Miss India
Miss Japan

QUESTION : Ms. America, how would you describe a male organ in your country?
MS. AMERICA : Well, I would say that male organs in America are like gentlemen.
QUESTION : Why do you say that?
MS. AMERICA : Because it stands everytime it sees a woman.....

(Applause!.... Applause!)

QUESTION : Ms. Spain, how would you describe a male organ in your country?
MS. SPAIN : Male organs in our country are like toros in our very own bullfight.
QUESTION : Why do you say that?
MS. SPAIN : Because it charges everytime it sees an opening.

(Applause!... Applause!)

QUESTION : Ms. Britain, how would you describe a male organ in your country?
MS. BRITAIN : Male organs in our country are like Shakespearian actors and Heroes.
QUESTION : Why do you say that?
MS. BRITAIN : Because it cries after every performance and because it is buried alive.

(Applause!... Applause!)

QUESTION : Ms. Iran, how would you describe a male organ in your country?
MS. IRAN : Well, I can say that male organs in Iran are like thieves
QUESTION : And why do you say that?
MS. IRAN : Because they always enter through the back door.....

(Applause!... Applause!)

QUESTION : Ms. India, how would you describe a male organ in your country?
MS. INDIA : Well, I can say that a male organ in India is like a labourer.
QUESTION : Why do you say that?
MS. INDIA : Because it works day and night....

(Applause!..Applause!)

QUESTION : Ms. Japan, how would you describe a male organ in your country?
MISS JAPAN: It's like an actor in a stage play....because it bows down after every performance.

(Applause!..Applause!)

QUESTION : Ms. Philippines, how would you describe a male organ in your country?
MS. PHILIPPINES : Ahh...well, opcors, hihihihi...I can say dat male organs in our country are like chismis...
QUESTION : Chismis???
MS. PHILIPPINES : Ayy! Sorry... Its ano, ahh kuwan...it means GOSSIP in our language.
QUESTION : Hmm... Interesting comparison. And why do you say that?
MS.PHILIPPINES : Ayy...Dyahe!!!!Hi hi hi hi hi hi...Kasi....I mean because it passes from mouth to mouth..

(STANDING OVATION!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!)